Made in Manhattan

Our four-year fertility journey of trying to conceive (TTC) includes: about 1000 injections 💉, numerous doctor visits and lab work in multiple cities, two unsuccessful inseminations (IUIs), two heartbreaking miscarriages in August 2022 👼🏻 & March 2023 👼🏻, getting our hopes up every single month for about 39 months only to repeat with hopeful tears: "Maybe next month" 🙏🏼🥲... and then came May 2023, when we decided to give IVF a try!

How could we lose hope when this is the deepest, most driven desire we've cultivated and journeyed together? It has only drawn us closer and made our love, admiration, and appreciation stronger! 💪🏼💖 I also have a newfound respect and admiration for women who have gone through IVF, because it is QUITE the freakin' journey mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially. 

And amidst one of the most arduous journeys, we remained full of Faith, Hope, and Gratitude... but it was still not the right time. A failed IVF in June 2023 was perhaps one of the most difficult things to endure because we put so much effort and hope into it. 😞 

After genetic testing and speaking to a geneticist, it seemed that IVF was going to be our best option; but we needed a break, and so we planned for a second round of IVF until January 2024. 

We decided that for the second half of 2023 we were going to travel as much as we possibly could, I would begin running and taking graduate classes again. Fast forward to December 2023... and we visited so many amazing places, I earned two As on my grad classes, and I ran (and won 🥇🥈🥉) a lot! 

They always say that when you're least expecting or out on vacation relaxed, is when it happens. The thing is, we knew that that didn't necessarily apply to us, because our journey is a unique, complex one. So, I hadn't been checking my fertile window nor had I been doing all our baby-making rituals.

But boy, did God have a big surprise for us because... WE'RE HAVING A BABY, Y'ALL! 🤰🏻👶🏻💕🎉

It was during our Thanksgiving trip to NYC when our long-awaited miracle happened. 🌟  New York City has always been a special place for us... from getting proposed at the Rockefeller in front of my family, to enjoying all the gems the "City that Never Sleeps" offers, and to now being the place where our little miracle baby was conceived. 

Our little one was Made in Manhattan! 🗽 

As I mentioned previously, we were not even trying to conceive because a natural pregnancy for us could potentially lead to another miscarriage. Heck, two weeks after our NYC trip I even ran the Reindeer 5K Run and I thought it was pretty strange that I threw up after the race. It's only 3 miles?! I started to notice little things here and there that gave me the feeling that I might be pregnant... but I waited until December 11th, 2023 to rush home to take a pregnancy test with my Hubby. We first used a generic test that showed a faint (+) line and then we used a Clear Blue digital test and... Pregnant! 

Something that seemed so far away for us is finally here! For our tenacity & perseverance has proven fruitful and we have been BLESSED with the miracle of conception. Hubby and I are on cloud nine! For we have prayed so very much and done everything possible for this! 

Little one, you are SO DESIRED and LOVED beyond measure! 🥰

We can say it was due to all our efforts along with innumerable factors that propelled us to an amazing new peak in our life and marriage... yet ALL that and STILL, it's ultimately God's timing, which is always perfectly on time! I would not want it any other way. We knew the importance of waiting to have a family until we had a stronger foundation, and God knew when it would be even more OPTIMAL for us. 

This journey has only strengthened our marriage, our patience, and our faith. We are beyond GRATEFUL, HUMBLED and APPRECIATIVE with firstly God and secondly with all those who kept us in their prayers and kept sending us the best vibes. We definitely feel the love! 🙏🏼🥰

¡Muchísimas gracias a todos! Thank you all so very much & we humbly ask for continued prayers and good vibes for a healthy pregnancy! We cannot wait for that magnificent day when we get to hold our precious little miracle baby in our arms! 🤰🏻👶🏻💕🤱🏻👨🏻‍🍼 #LosBoninos2024

For Plucks Sake

Ever since the scene between Ironman and Star-Lord in Marvel's Infinity War, the word plucky has stuck with me. To be plucky is to be brave, feisty, spunky and show determined courage amidst difficult times. How could I not be attracted to such a fun yet powerful word? I have always been intrigued by those people who display great valor and resiliency. Those who have experienced tremendous hardships and loss, but who have not allowed that to turn them cold; instead, they fan the flames that consume them until they're entirely engulfed, and from their ashes be reborn just like the mythical phoenix. 

Life has several inevitabilities and one of them is that no one is exempt from experiencing hardships. Not one soul goes through this life unscathed. We will all come face-to-face with something that shakes us to our core and hopefully transforms us for the better. It is because of these inevitable tough experiences, that I am enamored with those who can make the most out of any given situation. 

So, this is when self-righteousness may begin to peek its judgmental schnoz. We start to point and compare life experiences and begin to rate hardships. Stop right there... cause each one of us was brought up in an extremely unique family dynamic, raised in different environments, exposed to a distinct culture, experienced incomparable core memories (which includes personal traumas) and born with our very own distinctive traits. What seems feasible for some, may seem impossible for another. There is no universal measurement of how bad someone had it or who had it worse. Hardships are one hundred percent personal and nonetheless something that we need to learn how to be empathetic about. 

By the same token, we will never truly understand something until it happens to us. 

Friend A: You're exaggerating, friend; it's not that deep. 
Friend B: Why do you judge a pain you haven't lived?

Meaning, I did not fully understand death and the importance of being present at funerals, until I was sitting front row at my dad's service. Before this, I did not like attending funerals, but being on that front row made me realize the importance of being there for someone who just lost a loved one. 

Meaning, I did not completely understand compromise, until I met the love of my life. Before meeting my husband, I was going on 12 years of dating and being single, so I could not understand those women who would give up so much in order to make it work. Wait, I still don't agree with giving up your individuality for someone, but I do understand now the importance of compromise in a relationship especially when each one comes with their own baggage, perspectives and love language. 

Meaning, I did not truly understand infertility and miscarriages, until my husband and I began our own journey of trying to conceive. Before all this, I'd hear Invitro and miscarriages and was like okay; but let me tell you why I empathize on a deeper, more personal level with all those struggling with infertility. Because our journey thus far includes about 800+ injections (that I've administered), numerous doctor visits in McAllen/ Houston/ Matamoros/ Corpus/ Reynosa, two failed IUIs, endured two heartbreaking miscarriages in August 2022 👼🏻 & March 2023 👼🏻, getting our hopes up every single month for about 39 months only to repeat with hopeful tears: "Maybe next month"... and then as soon as I overcame my torturous D&C recovery, we decided to give Invitro a try only for it to be unsuccessful as well. We definitely have a newfound respect and admiration for women who have gone through invitro, because it is one TOUGH ass journey to embark on... mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. 

I have also learned that comments such as "you can always adopt" or "a baby should be a blessing from God" are utterly insensitive and ignorant especially if it's coming from someone who already has children. You have no idea the profound desire some women have of conceiving their own baby. It is unfathomable. And to quote Brené Brown, "If you're not in the arena also getting your ass kicked, I'm not interested in your feedback." 

Like the Avengers: Endgame though, we have literally done "Whatever It Takes." Tell me how can we possibly lose hope when this is the deepest, most driven desire we've cultivated together? It has only drawn us closer and made our love, admiration and appreciation stronger!  

And to come full circle, no one is exempt from experiencing hardships. Yes, life can be tough as hell, but it's what we do with the cards we are dealt with. Don't forget about what you already have that you prayed for and that what you have, someone may yearn for & vice versa. You can't always get what you want, but you can ALWAYS do your absolute best.

We are all fighting different battles, and no one is coming out alive anyways, so might as well make the best of it. 

"Life is not the party you imagined, but we're already here... so let's dance!"

Have yourself a good cry, pick yourself up, accept the things that you cannot change, make bold prayers, embrace the lessons, continue waking up with a grateful heart and keep on ROCKIN' N' ROLLIN', BABY! 

And for plucks sake... ¡Con Todo, Pa'Todo y En Todo! 

Thirty (ish)

Looking back at my wild twenties feels almost ancient to me. I have to admit that I was a little worried that I was never going to get tired of all the partying. Who would have thought that I would now be spending almost all of my free time attached to my husband’s hip and drinking once in a blue moon? Laura Luzbeth Coria so devoted to her husband and turning down drinks? Y’all better believe it… I love this guy more than I ever thought possible and drinking is just not as enticing when you’re trying to stay fit. I strongly desire and envision myself being a self-sufficient, devoted mother (just like my Momma) and am grateful that when the time comes to be a mom, I won’t have those “wild 20” cravings because I have truly gotten them out of my system already; thank goodness!

Even though our twenties are so fun and carefree, there is something undeniably and incredibly enjoyable about being in our thirties; well, that's until I got to the total game changers... 35 and 36! My, oh, my, have these been some tumultuous years. Would these years be considered early midlife crisis?  

When I decided to move to a small town to be with my then-boyfriend-now-hubby that was perhaps one of the biggest leaps of faith I had ever taken. We weren't engaged yet and I had never lived with a guy before, mostly because I had avoided serious relationships for about 12 years. Also, what would a small town life be like for someone who has always thrived with that hustle and bustle lifestyle? But of course I was up for the challenge! Although I have always prided myself with my ability to adapt to new environments without completely assimilating and being able to maintain my essence, it has not been as easy as I thought it would be. The complexities of love and relationships alone are a lot of work... and then add work stress, vicarious trauma from counseling students, being away from family & friends, a global pandemic, multiple deaths in the family and then also dealing with heartbreaking infertility (that is a whole other story). It’s been an extremely heavy period in my life, but filled with important life lessons and definitely humbling at the same time. 

 

One thing that hasn't change for me is my love for traveling. I’ve had my fair share of solo travels, but now I LOVE traveling with my husband and cannot wait to take our future babies on adventures (that we pray God blesses us with eventually). Traveling is essential because it broadens your horizons and is genuinely the best education you can get. To me a good life is a life well-traveled. When my husband and I were dating we made a deal that if we were going to live in little Agua Dulce, we had to travel as much as we could possibly fit in our busy schedule; and we are beyond grateful that together we’ve been able to visit 12 different states other than Texas and six foreign countries. And finally after living here for four years, I can honestly say that I love coming back to our peaceful home in the middle of nowhere; because even after all my travels, Texas is our favorite place to come home to. Texas IS Home.

You think that by 30 you will have learned the lessons from all of your “mistakes” or have healed from all your past wounds; and, I’m 30 (ish) and still learning new lessons as well as still healing from past hurts. You will come across similar situations that you hadn't quite fully overcome in your younger years, and it will trigger dormant feelings that you thought no longer existed within you. The point is to practice self-awareness and keep yourself in check.

Regardless, it's about being appreciative of all the learning and healing we’ve experienced thus far. Getting older means being even more selective about everything in general; but it's awesome knowing that we go through a continuous metamorphosis and shed off old misconceptions and naive mindsets while at the same time feeling more complete than ever.

Do not be merely surviving and going through the motions of life by relying on adaptive survival/coping mechanisms. Perhaps you didn’t partake in enough self-discovery or risk-taking in your twenties? Well, it's never too late to start! Please don't just point out the flaws in everyone else without focusing on your own. It can also be because denial and ignorance are bliss, since accepting the reality will be much too painful, require too much courage and/ or work. Life is an ongoing journey of growth though; we must continue to keep learning, improving and growing. We will continue to bump into new situations and encounter contrast because it is needed in order for us to shoot new rockets of desire and expand wonderfully. Trust the Process. 

I’m far from my years of medicating hurts or disappointments; less band-aiding and more digging deep to find the roots which need tending to. I’ve learned that no matter what I’ve been through, I’m glad that at least the harm was self-inflicted and I didn’t hurt others. I know we are all self-righteous, but God knows my heart and therefore my cup runneth over endlessly. I love how sincere and honest I am especially because it’s my favorite thing to see in others. I have been in many situations that have “tested” me and I have proudly and courageously stayed true to myself. Life feels extra sweet when you haven’t compromised your integrity in order to obtain something you desire.

At this point in my life, I have experienced a wide array of hardships and failures as well as successes and accomplishments. And I’m at a point in my life... where I’ve partied plenty to the point where I don’t need it anymore because I've upgraded my priorities; where I think about my health much more so that I have a better chance of living longer; where I can honestly say I don’t need to hear an “I’m sorry” in order to forgive (forgetting is the issue); where I’ve learned to accept and even point out my own faults; where I’ve become more tolerant with others and truly put an effort in seeing their positive aspects; where compassion & understanding are KEY but also keeping our distance from toxic people who are intrinsically unhappy and malicious beings; where I've learned to modify my habits which have improved my overall health; where I’ve come full circle with my renewed faith in God; where mainly and most importantly, I feel empowered knowing that I have the capacity to change whatever no longer serves me in order to continue expanding and becoming that woman I envisioned myself growing into... it was gonna happen at some point! We can only get better and better! I not only want this for myself, but also so that my future babies have a healthy mother who has a better chance of living longer for them, who is devoted to them, who is happy, who loves herself, who is kind, who is honest, who is faithful, who is fun, who takes them traveling and who is a disciplined role model that leads by example. 

I’m beginning to get the hang of "adulting". Even though life is not a competition, we all get sucked into this rat race of wanting more than we need in order to compete and be "better" than others; instead MOTIVATE, INSPIRE & UPLIFT each other! Tune into your own rhythm because everyone has their own beat. Enjoy the unique dance your life choreographs just for you. We all have an expiration date, so smile at the fact that since you know you’re going to die you’re going to make it your dominant intent to fill your life with beautiful memories of smiling, loving, laughing, doing good, being grateful and doing what makes you happy!